The scriptures of the Song of Solomon deserve more attention than they receive. In an age where promiscuity and open sexuality reigns, few people realize that the Maker of the Universe who created male and female has given us a relationship manual to follow in His Word! The Song of Solomon is God’s guide to Courtship, Engagement, and Married Love and provide specific instructions on how man and woman should treat and love each other.

The book was written by King Solomon, early in his life. The book is a “lyric idyll” which means that it is poetry that uses “flashbacks” or “reflections” to tell the story. In other words, the book is not in chronological order but is similar to a movie or a play in which the plot of the storyline temporarily stops while the audience views a scene from the past. Another important feature to understand about a “lyric idyll” poem is that it includes an imaginary group that speaks occasionally to make the transition from one “flashback” to another, or to emphasize a point. This “chorus,” as we will call it, is imaginary and serves only to reveal extra information to the reader.

The Song of Solomon is 15 reflections of a married woman, Shulamith, who was Solomon‘s first queen. Each reflection looks back to an event of their time of dating, the days leading to the marriage, the wedding night, or some of the problems of their early years together. It is therefore a very practical book dealing with real, everyday issues.

Many people have taught that the Song of Solomon has a symbolical meaning of representing Jesus Christ and His bride, the church. Because of this, and the poetical references that are hard for us to understand, most people skip actually taking the book at face value. I believe that the Song of Solomon can be viewed as an allegorical picture of Jesus Christ and the church, but only because marriage is an allegorical picture of our relationship with Jesus (see Ephesians 5:23-31). That is, God intended for marriage to be symbolical of our relationship with Him, not just the Song of Solomon. The book’s primary purpose is not to be an allegory, but to teach us scriptural principles of dating and marriage. In this study, we will take the book’s meaning for what it actually says and apply it to our male/female relationships today. In doing so we will find that it is the most powerful guide to married love ever written!

God could have spoken in medical or common terms when writing a book that deals with the subject of human sexuality and relationships, but medical terms are stiff and awkward, and we would not have understood the common “slang” terms of ancient times. God therefore avoided both situations and used poetic language and symbols to represent these terms. Some people view sex as “dirty” or “sinful” forgetting that God Himself created sexual desires as something beautiful to be shared between a husband and his wife. Sex is only “dirty” when it takes place outside of the sanction of marriage as God intended.

Those who say that the Song of Solomon is ONLY an allegorical portrait of Jesus Christ and His Bride eventually have their logic run into serious scriptural problems. For example, nowhere in the New Testament is the Song of Solomon quoted or alluded to as an allegory. It seems strange that Paul, who thoroughly knew Old Testament scripture, would not refer to the Song of Solomon while talking about how that Christ was the husband of the church (see Ephesians 5). Another problem if the Song of Solomon is written ONLY for the purpose of being an allegory, is that one must take certain verses and go against the clearly intended meaning. For example, I have heard many preachers quote Song of Solomon 2:1 and refer to Jesus Christ as the “rose of Sharon.” In context, however, it is the BRIDE that says “I am the rose of Sharon” and not the groom. If the term “rose of Sharon” is symbolically referring to Jesus Christ, then it is the only place in scripture where God is symbolized as a woman! Portions of the book can be used allegorically to paint a portrait of Jesus Christ and His bride, the church, but it is very clear that the foremost purpose of the book is to teach on proper dating and married love between a man and woman. With these points in mind, let’s begin our expository look at the Song of Solomon:

Throughout this study we will use the King James Version and identify the speakers in CAPITAL letters. There are four speakers in the poem: SOLOMON, the groom; SHULAMITH, Solomon’s bride; the CHORUS, which is an imaginary group that often bursts into song to give more information; and SHULAMITH’S BROTHERS who only appear briefly at the end of the book. As we will see, SHULAMITH is the most frequent speaker.

Verse 1 begins by telling us that King Solomon wrote the book, and that it is the best song of the 1,005 songs and poems that he wrote (see I Kings 4:32). Some people have cited that Solomon later had 300 wives and 700 concubines to doubt whether or not Solomon was qualified to write such a book about true love between one man and one woman. In studying this book, we must remember the following points: 1. The events of this book all deal with early events in the relationship which means that Solomon was probably young and only had one wife at the time of writing. 2. If Solomon did write this book while practicing polygamy, it would be a powerful argument against the fruitlessness and emptiness of having many wives because someone who had experienced having many wives realized the fulfillment of simply be married to one! 3. Solomon also wrote Proverbs and Ecclesiastes and, at some time in his life, violated most of the precepts that he advocated. But this does not necessarily mean that he was unqualified to write the scripture or that God’s inspired Word is not truth. For example, if we correct our child for getting angry and then have a fit of anger ourselves, does that make us unable to ever correct the child again? Does it mean that our earlier correction of the child was not correct or practical? 4. Many of Solomon’s extra wives were the result of political arrangements which was a common practice in those days. Because this book was written in the early years of his reign, it is probable that Solomon had not yet fallen into lustful polygamy.

The first reflection is a flashback to the day of their wedding. Shulamith is entering the palace and getting ready for her big day. As she thinks ahead to the planned events of the night, she is looking forward to seeing her beloved and kissing him. The Hebrew word translated “love” is dodem which often refers to sexual love. In the Hebrew culture, every joyful banquet of celebration was referred to as “wine.” What she is saying is that Solomon’s love and attention that she will receive on the Honeymoon will give her more joy than all the celebration that is planned.

In those days, people prepared for festive occasions by using scented oils similar to perfumes to give off a pleasant aroma. The point here is that such oil was precious and highly sought after. Shulamith is saying that she prizes Solomon highly and just the sound of his name creates in her a longing for him. She views Solomon as the most sought after bachelor in the land and imagines that he is so great that “all the maidens want him.”

As Shulamith thinks about how she loves Solomon, she looks forward to their honeymoon and anticipates her first night with him. At this point in the poem, the Chorus bursts forth with song and agrees with Shulamith that Solomon is just as she says that he is. Remember that the Chorus is imaginary and only serves to reveal to us more of the story. The chorus represents Shulamith imagining herself talking to certain people.

It is noteworthy that Shulamith does not view sex as dirty or sinful. She does not view it as “only for the man.” Shulamith is a virgin and yet looks forward to her honeymoon and her first night with Solomon. She is not afraid of sex and has a healthy view of it. This reveals to us that the sexual relationship between a man and his wife is proper and pleasing to God. Shulamith has a “holy desire” as she is anticipating sex on her honeymoon night. Many Christians today have rejected studying the Song of Solomon because they have been taught that sex is “dirty.” The world, through it’s propaganda of adultery and fornication, is the founder of this view. When a sexual relationship is between a man and his wife, God loves it, sanctions it, and encourages it. Going into a marriage with the view that sex in the marriage bed is “dirty” or “sinful” will lead to serious marriage troubles later. I heard someone say one time that “sex is like fire. If you place that fire in the fireplace, it is soothing, warming, and good. If you take that same fire and put it out of it’s proper place, say on the living room rug, then it quickly destroys the house.” Sex is only improper if it is “out of it’s place” that is, outside of a marriage relationship. People who have sexual relationships before they are married, tend to view sex as dirty and filthy because of the guilt that they have for what they did. That view comes from their sin and not from God!

Now Shulamith pretends that the Chorus is the pretty women of Jerusalem. Her physical appearance is quite different from the fair skinned women of the city. There are two reasons for this: 1. Probably her natural skin tone was extremely dark. Jewish history supports this view. 2. She was a country girl and her skin was even darker than it would have been from work outside in the sun. Shulamith is saying “I may look different that what you think is beautiful, but I am just as beautiful as you.”

The “tents of Kodar” refer to special tents of the day made out of valuable black goat hair. When the light hit the skins, it reflected off in a striking beautiful way. Solomon obviously had curtains hanging throughout his palace made of this expensive goat skin. She is saying “I may be different but Solomon thinks I am stunning!”

She explains that her complexion is as dark as it is because of exposure to the sun while working in the vineyards. From this verse we get our first glimpse of Shulamith’s childhood. Her brothers are called her “mother’s children.” This almost certainly means that her father died early in her life. As we will see later, Shulamith’s older brothers helped raise her and watch out for her. Financially, times were probably tough as even the female children had to work outside to help. “Mine own vineyard” refers to Shulamith’s physical complexion. Because of working for the family’s vineyards, she was not able to keep her complexion in the accepted style of the day.

These verses do not mean that Shulamith was “frumpy” or unkempt, for her physical appearance had attracted the richest man in all of the land! What they mean is that Shulamith was comfortable with the way that she looked and did not depend upon the accepted fashion of the day for her beauty. True beauty comes from being confident and comfortable with the way that God has made us! We should not have to have “the latest styles and fashions” in order to feel beautiful. Everyone has something that they consider an “imperfection” and yet we need to learn from Shulamith to view our differences from each other as something beautiful and desirable! The way that others view our imperfections usually depends upon our attitude toward our imperfections! Shulamith had a positive attitude toward her “faults” and that attitude was more attractive to her future husband than whether or not she lived up to the “status quo” of other women. The woman’s attitude toward something will influence the husband’s view of it. For instance, if the wife is always complaining that her hair “looks horrible,” then eventually the husband will begin to think about her hair as “horrible,” even if at first he liked it. The husband’s attitude also dictates what is important to the wife. Solomon loved Shulamith and thought that she was beautiful despite her not living up to what society said was pretty. If a husband is obsessed with whether or not his wife looks like a supermodel with the latest fads and figure, then the woman will be affected by those things. We need to follow the scriptural example and appreciate the natural beauty of each other without holding our spouses up to the “air-brushed” ideals of the world.

Being a country girl, Shulamith was familiar with the activities of shepherds and their flocks. Here, she compares Solomon’s job of king as a shepherd over Israel. She is in the palace and is getting ready for the big day, but Solomon is still out on official business. She is thinking with concern, “what if I want him and he is away after we are married?” “How can I find him?” The phrase “one that turneth aside” can be literally translated as “one who veils herself” and is a reference to harlots who in that day veiled themselves with a cloth wrapped around their head and went out looking for lovers. What Shulamith is saying to herself is that she will not be able to go looking for Solomon when they are married because to do so would make her appear as seeking other male attention. The very thought of appearing immodest or encouraging the affections of other men is repulsive to her. Shulamith loves one man and only seeks attention from him.

That people would not recognize her is very unlikely, for they would recognize that she was the queen. What Shulamith is concerned about is someone realizing that she is lonely and trying to take advantage of the open door. Shulamith is concerned with giving the “appearance of evil.” Men could recognize a woman’s intentions and motives by the way that she dressed in Solomon’s time, and they still can today. The woman may not be actively trying to get the attention of a man, and may not realize that she is doing so, but every man in the world will get the message. A neckline too low, a hemline too high, a see-through blouse, a too high split in a skirt, or clothing just a size too small are all noted by the male population! The fashion of our society pushes skimpy and revealing clothing as being the trend, but for a Godly woman, the attitude of Shulamith is the correct one: “I care less about what society accepts as normal and more about what God says is acceptable. My body is for the eyes of my husband and to him only will I reveal it.” “I will avoid the very appearance of evil in my dress and actions.” Keep in mind that actions do matter. A woman can be very modestly dressed and yet give a completely different message with her actions. Women must be careful of both their dress and actions. Men must also learn to recognize the signs and guard themselves from the advances of such women.

The imaginary chorus (which here is representing the voice of her conscience) advises Shulamith that if she is to marry Solomon, she must realize that his job will often take him away from her. If she cannot accept that, then she does not need to marry a king but return to the country and marry a shepherd.

Before we say “I do” we must “count the cost.” Somewhere in Shulamith’s decision to accept Solomon’s proposal, she had to make a decision to accept the lifestyle of being married to a king. She was not just marrying an ordinary shepherd, but the “shepherd of all Israel!” Marriage was not going to be endless days of vacation with Solomon gazing in her eyes for hours and composing songs about her. There would be times when the affairs of the kingdom called Solomon away for brief periods of time and, as queen, Shulamith would have to accept that. Even though she was in love with Solomon, Shulamith did not allow her emotions to blind her to the reality of the choice that she was making. She was choosing to leave the country and her simple way of life for the palace and there were good points and bad points to consider. She is not marrying him with the plan of eventually getting him to change from being king, but is making the decision “can I love him and live with him in his present vocation?”

True love is a decision. A man and woman must “count the cost” before they plunge into marriage and too many divorces come from the fact that many people go into marriage with the idea that “I’ll change them eventually.” The woman must ask herself the following questions: “Can I live with the demands of his job and lifestyle?” If his job involves traveling, will you accept some lonely nights, or will you whine about them until they cause problems in your relationship? If you marry a doctor, then will you kiss him goodbye at 3 am and fix him a coffee when he is called out, or will you complain and punish him for the schedule of his vocation? If your fiancé has a calling in his life for the ministry, will you sacrifice all in response to the call of God on his life? A man must ask himself the following questions: Will you provide her needs and be willing to sacrifice some of your personal time to spend time with her? Are you willing to provide for her physical, spiritual, and emotional needs? Are you aware of her family’s issues and are you willing to patiently help her overcome their faults and struggles? Are you aware of her goals and dreams and willing to allow them to blossom and develop under your care? Jesus Christ emphasized “counting the cost” before committing to something (see Luke 14:28-30). We must “count the cost!” Sometimes a man will change careers after marriage, and that is when the commitment to love must cause the wife to accept and support it, even though it may have caught her by surprise. Remember the commitment “till death do us part” was a decision and a vow that you chose to take!

The second reflection is a short one and is a “flashback” to the events of the wedding banquet. It is composed entirely of conversation between Solomon and Shulamith.

This certainly does not sound very romantic to us, but that is because the King James Version English obscures the true meaning. The New King James corrects the verse to read “to my filly among Pharaoh’s chariots.” Solomon is not comparing his bride to a bunch of horses, but to HIS personal horse. At that time, horses were not “beasts of burden” but were the companion of kings and a sign of wealth. The Scriptures tell us that Solomon loved horses for he had 1,400 chariots and 12,000 horsemen (I Kings 10:26). His personal horse must have been the finest mare in the world. In today’s vernacular Solomon was simply saying “you are one in a million.”

Solomon compliments her on her appearance and the jewelry that she was wearing. Remember that people in the Old Testament often wore outlandish jewelry because their bodies were not “the temple of the Holy Ghost.” The New Testament teaches that we are not to depend upon such outlandish jewelry or fine clothing to make us beautiful (see I Peter 3:1-4).

Solomon says that her jewelry is nice, but then promises to make her more beads even more precious. The point here, is that Solomon is promising to give little expressions of love AFTER they are married! Why does love have to die at the altar of marriage? The scriptural principle is that little things do keep the romance kindled! The gifts do not have to be gold and silver; what about flowers for no reason, or a packet of scented bubble bath? Maybe a mushy card for no occasion or something pretty in which she can sleep. Women can give small things as well. How about fixing his favorite dinner and serving it by candlelight? How about arranging for a babysitter unexpectedly and having everything prepared for a quiet, romantic evening together at home? The greatest gifts are those that are given simply because of love and not out of obligation to a holiday or occasion. Whatever it took to attract our spouse is the same thing that we must continue to do in order to keep our romances alive and well!

This refers to the scent of the perfumed oil with which she earlier anointed herself. Shulamith sees the scent drifting toward Solomon as symbolic of her love reaching out to him. Obviously, the banquet is in a very romantic setting!

In that time, it was customary for the woman to wear a small sack of myrrh or other perfumed substance around her neck so that it lay upon her chest all night. All the next day, the scent would linger there. She is stating that Solomon is like that sachet of myrrh in two ways: tonight, on their wedding night, he will lay upon her chest, and his love brings out her beauty and the best in her. Shulamith is once again looking forward to her first night spent with her love. The other point to note here is that she is marrying someone who brings out the best in her. We should choose to love someone who’s presence causes us to be more pleasant and beautiful! Someone who brings out the worst side of us should not be considered as marriage material!

“Camphire” means “yellow-white henna blossoms.” It was a beautiful flower often used in ornaments or pretty arrangements. Shulamith is continuing the thought of above by saying that having Solomon makes her even more beautiful than she was! “En-gedi” was the location of vineyards and gardens that Solomon had planted in the hills west of the Dead Sea. It was literally an oasis in the midst of the desert country, and Shulamith is basically saying that her love is “like an oasis in a desert” or “refreshing” to her.

As they move toward the bedroom, we can see that Shulamith has made her decision to leave the country and become a queen. She has “counted the cost” and decided that she will endure occasional loneliness to be with her true love. She is a beautiful woman who does not depend upon the societal fashions for her beauty. She views her “imperfections” as strengths, and has a healthy, Godly view of sex. Despite the death of her Dad at a young age, she has been raised without any distorted view of men or the marriage relationship!